New Amputee...

[hawkeye]

Hi everyone,
My amazing husband lost his left leg below the knee last week due to multiple complications from a compound fracture 15 years ago, multi level lumbar fracture almost 3 years ago, neuropathy and foot drop, and poor circulation (cant think of the diagnosis right now). Long story short, he got an infection after stepping on a staple and didn't know it until I saw it. It eventually lead to gangrene then the leg arteries collapsed. Doctors had no choice but to remove his leg. He's only 28 years old, but Nic is in good health not counting the leg problems he has had. He's still in the hospital and is recovering well and doing everything in his power to walk again. He's somewhat relieved about the whole thing, but is angry and depressed. He has a great doctors, nurses and therapists, and his side of the family flew in from across the country and for support. I hope to learn about supporting my amazing husband, and for my husband to learn something too. My husband the strongest and most loving man I know.

[cherylm]

Hi, hawkeye, and welcome to the Forum! I can relate to your husband's situation...I'm also a left, below-knee amputee who lost her leg due to a long series of complications from a fracture. I can tell you that "angry and depressed" is not an unusual first reaction and that, with time, that should change. Think about everything you've heard about folks going through the various stages of grief: right now, your husband is grieving the loss of his leg. Eventually, he'll make it through all the stages and be able to accept that the amputation was necessary and go on from there.

The good news is that, as he recovers from the amputation surgery, gets back home, and begins to get back to living a normal life, he'll discover that "normal life" is truly possible. I can say that, after all the years I spent dealing with various leg problems, the actual amputation was a turning point for the better: I could get back to living again, instead of spending months in pain, in the hospital, off work, etc., etc..... Your husband may well make the same discovery: a healthy life with a prosthetic leg can be much better than life with a hopelessly bad "real" leg.

Right now, I'd suggest that you let him feel and say whatever he is feeling and wants to say. Be supportive, be proud of his accomplishments, but DON'T tell him to "be positive," or, heaven forbid, "cheer up." He's going to be on an emotional roller coaster for a while to come... but eventually that roller coaster ride will end and he'll find his sense of balance again.

Check out the information on all of the threads here on the Forum. If he shows any interest, by all means get HIM to check things our here and through other sources. Learning about dealing with life one-legged will be reassuring for both of you. If you have any questions at all, ASK THEM. This is a situation most folks never expect to find themselves in...you're both at the point where you don't even know what it is you don't know. So ASK: there is no such thing as a dumb question! And we're a friendly, helpful bunch who have been there. We participate in groups like this specifically because we want to make sure that other folks going through amputation don't have to do it alone.

[allen]

Hi Hawkeye,

Well the last part of his story sounds similar..I too was the victim of a staple which led to a series of bone infections (5 of them) over the course of a year finally ending in a right below the knee amputation.

I agree with everything Cheryl said... and this period is probably the toughest, waiting to heal, so he has nothing do but sit and "think" and feel how useless he is right now. He should be doing physical therapy exercises a couple times a day to keep his muscles strong and flexible, getting ready for his prosthetic, that is his job at the moment. Get him out of the house.. preferably using crutches (helps with the muscles). Also..dont be afraid to ask him to do a bit around the house..and dont cater to him (I'm assuming he has a way to move around the house like a wheelchair).


And I sooooo have to agree with Cheryl when she said "you don't even know what it is you don't know". Those words are so true. For me..I got a lot from watching www.youtube.com/user/AmputeeOT/videos. She covers a lot of topics, from fun to serious and gave me my first look at what to expect. I definitely felt like I was out on my own, so I did a lot of googling and such. Don't be afraid to ask questions...especially early on...whether you ask us, the doctor or the prosthetist...ASK! But as Cheryl said things do get better and dare I say...almost normal Hope to heart back from you..and your husband!

Allen

[stonecutter]

Hello - just wanted to chime in - the responses you've got so far are great responses - we are all open to fielding any question you or your husband might have.

I am a left below-the-knee as a result of an industrial accident when I was 19 years old. I am now 43 and life is good! From my experience, it was hard to see past what I was going through but life normalized. You said he's a very strong person - well - this will make him one tough SOB!